Tuesday, May 20, 2014

Falling off the wagon

Friday after leaving work I spent some time just loving on my kids and trying to take in the fact that I wouldn't see my coworker again. When the Schwan's man came I ordered icecream cones for the kids and low cal icecream sandwiches for myself. It was nice to spend the time with them. It did help.

Saturday we had a random day. We piled into the van and drove through the neighborhood garage sales. After that we made our way to Monroe to check out what was going on there. When that failed to entertain us we drove out to see Bill's grandparent's home. The new owners had been doing a lot of remodeling. We also stopped at his uncle's garage sale just down a few homes. After that we drove out to Dundee and had lunch at Applebee's. I had a 550 cal steak meal and the kids had french bread pizza, low fat yogurt and strawberries and Bill had the pasta bowl. We did a quick run through Cabela's and got the kids kettle corn and a pressed penny. And after scarfing down the popcorn, we drove across the street to the Russell Stover store and got them each a small heart box with 3 bon bons each. Bill and I got a small treat each, mine was 140 cals. I then walked over to the St. Julian's winery and got some peach spumante and Bill some hard cider.

Later that evening Bill and I went out to Asiana's in Monroe for soup, spring rolls and some fried rice. We stopped in to see my Grandmother at the IHM rehab center. She had her knee replaced and is getting some TLC. We took Grace home, she'd gone to visit Gram with my Pa, and then headed out again to have a dinner date. I had wanted some simple comfort food but Panera's was closed so we ended up having some Mexican at the Blue Margarita's.

Just to show you where my train of thought was going I picked up a fitness video and spent most of Sunday working off Saturday. I felt bad that we ate out so much. But I just couldn't handle my friend's passing without some comfort food. I'm doing my best to get back on but the sitting through counseling and trying to make up all the work at work that we skipped Friday is killing me. I did do some dancing at my desk last night but I never got to 10,000 steps.

They say it gets easier, but each time I see her office I want to see her there. I'm praying she's found peace. I'm angry that she's gone. I'm horrified to think of her last minutes. But if anyone deserves heaven, it would be Mary. She was so funny and kind. Mary, if you could read this blog post, you'd be happy to know that I finally ate something not green LOL I even brought in chocolate chocolate chip cookies and chocolate chip cookies at work for the ladies. We miss you. </3

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